Answering Machine

Top 10 messages left on the Small-Group Leader's answering machine.

10."Uh … I'm not going to make it tonight. I've lost my American Express Card and can't leave home without it."

9. "I know I was supposed to bring the refreshments, but I forgot about making something for my daughter's bake sale at school and well…"

8. "My sister-in-law just dropped off her six kids with me and I was wondering if it would be OK to bring them along with me to group tonight…"

7. Singing "On the third day of Christmas my small group gave to me, stomach cramps and a temperature of 103"!

6. "Call from your apprentice: 'Was I supposed to lead group tonight or were you doing it?' "

5. "Since I take our regular-attendance covenant seriously, I'm definitely coming tonight. I'm hoping the group will lay hands on me for my contagious rash."

4. "I just pulled in the driveway for our small group meeting at the Jones'…it looks pretty deserted … what was it you said last week about the rapture … "

3. "We're bringing our son's junior high hockey team over for group. Their game got cancelled. I'm sure you'll have something for them to do!"

2. "Absent group member: "I know group started 10 minutes ago, and I know you don't answer the phone during small group, but could you have my wife call me…"

1. "Hi, sorry I couldn't talk with you directly, but I thought I'd tell you I'm bringing someone tonight to fill our open chair. Well, actually 15 somebodies. I met this biker gang who has nothing to do tonight … "

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