10. Promising larger burgers on the grill.
9. "Do you want to come over to my house Wednesday night and play "monopoly"?
8. SugarBusters Communion Services the first Sunday of each month!
7. Promising a "critical review of Sunday's sermon at each meeting".
6. Distributing bumper stickers to members that say, "Non-Christians Suck"
5. If you join a small group this week, and this week only, We'll turn on the jets, heat up the water and let you and your family enjoy next week's service from the baptismal.
4. Wet Christian T-shirt contests prior to Wednesday night services/small group meetings.
3. "If you ever want to see your family again…"
2. Boasting of your happy hour after each meeting.
1. Promising newcomers they'll get to vote one person off the church staff each week.
