Q & A
Q & A Discussion: Sam O'Neal
Our church is forcing us to welcome a convicted sex offender into our family-friendly small group. Is that right?
| Topics: | Accountability, Character, Children, Confidentiality, Difficult people, Ethics, Legal issues, Liability, Youth |
| Filters: | Coach, Director, Family groups, Group Leader, Parents, Pastor, Train, Youth group |
| Purpose: | Discipleship |
| References: |  |
| Date Added: | August 19, 2008 |
Unfortunately, your church is doing precisely the opposite of what is ethical and legal. It's also putting itself at a great financial risk because of potential liability.
There has been a lot of legal pressure in recent years to make sure that any organization that intentionally brings children in contact with adults does everything in its power to prevent an act of child sexual abuse from occurring. This includes Boy Scouts, schools, day care centers—and churches. If these organizations do not take reasonable steps to prevent abuse, they can be guilty of negligence and liable for big, big lawsuits.
For example, if this individual were to sexually abuse a child in your small group, it is very possible that the parent of that child would seek to sue the church for damages (both situations happen a lot more than you may think). In order to prove that the church was not negligent, leaders would have to show that they took a "reasonable standard of care" to prevent the abuse from happening. This often includes background checks, layers of supervision, membership in a church for at least six months before an adult can work with children, and so on.
In your situation, however, the church is intentionally forcing a known sex offender into several relationships with children. Beyond the fact that such a decision makes no common sense, it is extremely negligent and an extremely bad idea from a legal and financial aspect.
The leaders of your church must believe that this individual has genuinely been changed through the power of Christ, and I truly hope that is correct. But he is still human and still subject to weakness. And such a conversion doesn't change the fact that your church (and your small group) has a moral and legal responsibility to protect the children in its care.
You can learn a lot more about this issue at one of our sister resources: http://www.reducingtherisk.com/.
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What was the nature of the crime? How long has the person been rehabilitated? If he claims he began healing many years ago, can these claims be substantiated? If he were to repeat his acts who are his likely victims? If he is in recovery or has recovered, he will know his vulnerabilities. What are they? A now-30 year old who had a "Romeo and Juliet" offense at age 18 is far different than a 40 year old who was caught molesting a teen or preteen in the last 10 years. The sincerity of a person with a long, verifiable track record of progressive healing is much easier to take at face value than someone whose verifiable history of healing stops only 1 or 2 years ago. A person who raped an adult woman but who is now wheelchair-bound is at practically 0% chance of re-offending. If a person's sincerity is not in question and he says he is only at risk when high and he's been sober for several years and has a strong sobriety plan, he's not likely to be a risk to anyone while sober.
To my knowledge there are guidelines that a released sex offender MUST obey. In our state this would NOT be allowed. That should be checked out with the local govering authorities (not the person) before any movement is made in this direction. Obeying the laws are very important for all of us, even tho' we may not feel they are fair.
I agree with Melanie. Just because someone is a sex offender does not mean they are a danger to CHILDREN... they may be to WOMEN... or MEN for that matter! Secondly, how long ago was he convicted (or released). Unfortunately the title is for life, for some long after they have repented and been "rehabilitated". As the Body I believe it is our responsibility to extend grace to him. Let him know that you are aware of his past, but affirm to him that God has a better future for him... be active about his personal growth as a discipleship - for his sake and that of those in your group - regardless of age!
I am all for forgiveness and showing mercy to sinners, but the reality is that depending on what type of charges were levelled against this individual, whether for crimes against children or adults, he needs to be placed with a proper group that can support him, hold him accountable, and prevent him from temptation and from harming others. If, for example, he is a rapist maybe he should be placed in a men's group instead of a couple's group for his good and for the safety of the other group members. THis is especially imortant if the group meets in homes instead of at the church or a restaurant.
Some of the comments are misinterpreting the question. It doesn't say the person isn't allowed to attend the church, but rather a small group within it that is family friendly i.e., children. I agree with the answer Sam O'Neal provided. Thanks Sam!
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