Why You Need (Dot)Community

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Because you were never Superman, after all.

Sam O'Neal | posted 6/02/2009

Topics:	Community, Connecting, Group leader, Guidance, Mentoring, New leader, Shaping, Shepherding
Filters:	Coach, Director, Group Leader, Lead, New leader
Purpose:	Discipleship
References:	Proverbs 3:5 , Romans 12:5 , Galatians 6:2
Date Added:	June 02, 2009

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Okay, I'm a big believer in authenticity, so let me say right away that part of this article includes a sales pitch for Dot Com(unity)—the co-learning experience we feature on the Small Group Dynamics blog. Although I'm not sure if I can call it a sales pitch, because the Dot Com(unity) experience is currently free. (If you're not familiar with what I'm talking about, check out this quick blog post to get an idea before reading on.)

So why should you keep reading? Because you need community, whether or not there is a (dot) attached to it.

Maybe you're thinking, I've already got community. I'm in a small group. And that's great. You should be in a small group. But if you happen to be the leader of that particular small group, I think you might need something a little extra. Something more. Because as I've said many times before, leading a small group is tough work. It's rewarding work, for sure, but it's tough. And whether you know it or not, you need some help.

The Death of Superman

I've never been a big comic book guy, but I'm a pretty big fan of superheroes. Batman and Spiderman are pretty cool, and the X-men, too. I try to stay away from the fringe heroes—Plastic Man and Spawn and all the rest—but even someone like Captain America has some appeal.

Still, there's nobody who compares with Superman. As far as I'm concerned, he sits alone at the top of Superhero Mountain. And I don't think I'm the only one who feels that way.

Did you ever wonder why that is? Why is he so much better than all the rest? True, his super-powers are pretty sweet. But I think it also has to do with the fact that he works alone.

Think of the other superheroes you know. They all have teams or sidekicks, right? I mean, where would Batman be without Alfred and Lucius Fox? (I don't really recognize Robin as having existed.) The X-men work as a team, and a bunch of other "loner" type of heroes usually clump up into groups like the Justice League. Even Spiderman has Aunt May and Mary Jane, not to mention the Black Cat from time to time.

But not Superman. He works alone. There are other characters in his universe, like Lois Lane, but their main job is to get themselves into peril so that Superman can rescue them. When the bad stuff goes down, it's always Superman vs. the enemy (or enemies). Whatever is required to make everything all right, it has to come from Superman's body and Superman's mind—nowhere else.

So here's the point: Too many small-group leaders think of themselves as Superman. And I include myself in that assessment. We think we have to do it all.

Sure, we may assign different tasks to other group members—things like bringing snacks or e-mailing out the prayer requests, or even leading worship. But not when it comes to the "real work" of small-groups ministry. I'm talking about spiritual formation, teaching, managing group dynamics, salvation. When it comes to those items, the Big Stuff, we keep them securely on our shoulders.

To Be Geniuses

The problem with that line of thinking is that the Big Stuff of small-group ministry is really big. I mean, BIG. Think of teaching, for example. Who are we to think that we can teach another person, let alone a group of people? Doesn't that mean we completely understand what we're teaching? Doesn't that mean we've "got it all together"? And something like salvation? Yikes!

But there's another problem with our Superman mentality, and this one is pretty painful for me to even think about. Because when I take a step back and try to get an objective look at myself, I realize that my shoulders are pretty small. Dangerously small, when you compare them with what I'm trying to carry.

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Lisa Martinez

June 07, 2009 8:17am

Creatively used to get to the point, we all are not supermen/superwomen. This article hits exactly where i been hurting, lonely at the top! Thank you for sharing